growing up

I know I said I'd post pictures from the last couple weeks and whatnot in my last post, but I changed my mind. A friend of mine started a post on all that she is thankful for, and it got me thinking. Throughout my first year away from home, I've realized a lot about myself and my life that I hadn't been able to acknowledge before because I'd never distanced myself from how I grew up. If you know me, you know that I have a lot to be thankful for- a nice house, a car, good friends and an amazing family, etc. etc. Some have even called me a little spoiled. And until I took myself out of that comfortable situation and found myself in an entirely new world with very few familiar faces, I couldn't see any of that fully. Now I see what people mean when they say college makes you grow up.

Upon reflecting on the past year, here's what I've come up with to be thankful for:

Family: I know this is so cliche, but I really have come to see how amazing my family is. I thought seeing them every couple months would be no big deal, but I was surprised to figure out how much I miss them. When I go home, I feel like I've missed out on so much every time, even though it's just daily life. On the bright side, it gives us things to talk about. But it is so weird not being there all the time and just knowing what's happening in everyone's life. Before college, I never would've said I'm SUPER close to my family. Now I feel like I'm a lot closer than a thought. Or maybe absence just makes the heart grow fonder ;)

I'm oh-so-grateful for these two wonderful people right here. Not only did they raise me right, they've seen my at my worst and still love me. I can't ever thank them enough for how they have shaped me as a person, guiding me towards incorporating all the right values into my everyday life. I know I haven't always appreciated them, but I realize now that everything they do is out of love for me (cheesy, I know, but I believe it). 

These crazy kids are tough not to miss. They may frustrate me to no end, but I will always love 'em :) Every time I go home, I'm amazed at how much they're growing as people (and just growing.... Abby is about as tall as me, to her ultimate delight, and Maddie is tall-er at least). In a way it makes me sad because I feel like I'm missing a big part of their life. They're almost like 'my' kids because of the age differences, so it's hard to miss out on so much of just daily life. It's a good thing I'll get my fill of them over the summer :P

Friends: 

All the new people I've met this year (regardless of whether or not the friendships lasted) have made a big impact on my life at Western. They have also made me think about friendship and what it means to me. I've realized that it doesn't matter how many friends I have if they aren't real friends. I want to surround myself with those I care about, and those that care about me. So while my friend group has shifted multiple times throughout the year, I've learned a lot about people and how much the golden rule applies to life. I hope those I've really connected with will still be around to talk to next year.

This girl right here ^ could be in her own category entirely. Sarah Elizabeth Adams is, and has been since 9th grade, my best friend. She has been there through everything and basically my family. I love and appreciate her more than I could ever express, and I miss her like crazy because of how infrequently I get to see her. I'm so proud of all she has accomplished this year with her photography and everything else. <3

Niles, as I'm sure most people who read this know, is my boyfriend. The story of how we met is long and complicated and involves a lot of backstory, but I'm definitely glad it happened. I don't want to get all gross and girly on everyone, so I won't go on too long here... He is pretty funny (although I try not to let him know that, so hopefully he doesn't read this...), he makes me challenge my thinking, he actually wants to hear me complain about everything, he's sweet. Overall, he is a really great guy and I appreciate his existence immensely. 

Food: 

On the rare occasion that I don't have to eat dining hall food, I appreciate it so much. :)

The Simple Things: 

Reading for fun has been eliminated from my schedule almost entirely with my busy schedule. I miss getting sucked into a good book. I'm taking advantage of my free time this summer, definitely.

Ice cream has saved me multiple times. It has memories attached to it, it reminds me of home, it tastes good, it keeps me awake. Who cares if it's good for you? I miss having real ice cream readily available. All they have here is soft serve!

Coloring. I spend less and less time with kids, and I miss coloring. Enough said.

Setting sun, swing set, family. Simple moments like this that make such great memories.

My bed. The only place that has been MINE this whole year. 

Margins in notebooks for doodles. How else would I survive class? 

The occasional rainbow on days I need it most. 

Children:

I know not everyone understands my adoration of children. I've tried to explain, but my attempts have failed. All you need to know is that kids can always put a smile on my face, and they continue to inspire me. They're the reason I want to do what I want to do with my life, and as long as I can see the potential in them I will be happy. 

Coffee: 

Caffeine. Chocolate. Sugar. 

Keeps me awake for studying.

My Laptop:

This thing has been my lifeline this year. I do everything on it- homework, facebook, blog, music, pictures, movies, TV shows, games. 

New Perspectives: 

I've learned a lot about my own prejudices (that I don't like admitting I have) and beliefs this year, but also a lot about other people's POVs (points of view). Especially being somewhere like Bellingham, I've learned so much by just opening my eyes and observing what goes on around me. This is the point in my life where I'm taking what my parents have taught me and what I've learned from outside sources and meshing it all together into what my own values are and should be. 

What Lies Ahead:

It's crazy growing up and redefining myself, but I have to realize that the adventure is just beginning. Everything I've learned this year is just a tiny drop in the ocean of knowledge out there I haven't even begun to experience. I don't know what lies ahead, but I'm along for the ride wherever it takes me. 

I know this was long, but maybe you learned something about me. I know I've learned a lot about myself this year, and so much about what I have to be thankful for. Including everyone reading this. 

That's all for now. 

<3

done

After a really insane quarter, I made it to the end of my first year at Western. There were some overwhelming moments (especially in the last couple weeks) when I thought the end would never come, but I have officially completed all coursework and tests- thank you, early finals!

Even though I spent the majority of it complaining, I got a lot out of this quarter. I took an intro to teaching class that placed me in a first-grade classroom once a week in addition to the instruction on campus. Practically drowning in assignments, I didn't realize the value of everything I ended up doing until yesterday. I had to plan and teach various lessons, test students to see if they were at grade-level, learn and apply behavior and classroom management skills, construct a bond with a class, relate every detail of what I observed and participated in to articles I was reading about education and teaching and state standards and lesson-planning..... (I tried making a list of everything I had to do in one week for this class, and it was so overwhelmingly long that I gave up). All of this was supposed to happen in 8 days of being with these students. Somehow it was all accomplished, although I'm still figuring that one out... haha.

So yesterday was my last day in the class with the kids, and my heart was broken by 26 first graders asking me not to go (I keep hearing that I'm good with kids, so I'm hoping this is true and all of you aren't just lying to be nice!). That ,paired with the feedback I got from my CT (cooperating teacher, the one I was observing), reassured me that this is what I want to be doing with my life. Kids are at time disgusting, annoying, frustrating, loud, needy... They're unpredictable and insane, I'll be the first to admit. Something about them is inspiring and intriguing though. They have to trust those around them to guide them down the right path, they have so much potential, they're creative and silly and fun to be around. They have the biggest imaginations and can create whole new worlds to play in. Tell me that's not incredible! 

Anyway, moving on..... It's weird to think my "first" year at college is over. I'm definitely ready for a break though. Fingers crossed the sun and warm weather comes back soon. 

I'll update again soon with some pictures of the process of packing up my dorm room and whatnot. I've also been experimenting with a new photo editing program, so I'll post some of the outcomes. I'm just too lazy to find all the correct files at the moment. 

<3

update

Here's a quick update on my life:

I have more work now than ever before in my life.
I LOVE being around kids, no matter how ridiculous they may be.
I officially put money down on an apartment for next year today.
I barely have time to sleep, let alone have a life beyond school, but somehow I'm surviving.

I went home a couple weeks ago for my dad's birthday. 

I didn't tell anyone I'd be there until I was 45 minutes away. 

Surprise!

I went to a baseball game with my dad on Saturday and then we walked along the water.

It was a beautiful day. 

And I ended up with a sunburn. 

Go figure. 

The sunset was amazing the day I drove back. 

Theresa had a night out to keep us sane last weekend.

We went to a crepe place that just opened, and then decided to get ice cream, too. 

Anyway, I've got to go back to writing lesson plans, finishing midterms, and reading millions of textbook pages before I get too far behind and can never catch up. 

Then I'd have to drop out. 

Luckily I have a backup plan. 

Life in a cardboard box on the street with Sarah doesn't sound too bad right about now. 

kbye. 

Taking the first step

...is always the hardest part of the journey (I think).

Lately I've been realizing how quickly my future is coming at me. It's pretty terrifying, to be honest. I'm in the education program at Western, I've been thrown into a classroom for a full day once a week (which may seem like nothing, but it's crazy how much work is involved in being a student and a student teacher at the same time), I'm being given tips and rules and guidelines from every direction that I'm supposed to turn into some comprehensible set of information that I can apply to my career. This was all fine and dandy (although a little overwhelming) until it hit me that in a couple years (as in less than 5, if things go according to plan), I will be responsible for doing this all on my own. I'll have my own students that I'm responsible for. I'm so used to being told what to do that this is just crazy. What if I mess up? Or the students don't like me? Or I have issues with the parents? Or any other possible thing that could go wrong??? Why would anyone trust me, of all people, to educate their child? 

Then I made myself take a deep breath and remember that I'm still just starting out, and I will get lots of practice. But still, it's crazy to think that I'm not going to be a student forever!

Also, being around kids al the time (literally, I'm in schools and I'm a nanny) makes me miss these kids (who are growing up way too fast for my liking, especially since I'm not constantly around them). 

In other news, I got my quarterly room rearrangement out of the way last weekend! I get bored leaving my furniture in the same place for too long, so when Elizabeth is gone for the weekend I tend to get creative... luckily she's cool with it. Or pretends to be at least. Haha. 

My bed is now against a wall instead of in front of the windows, which makes our room so much brighter! Especially with the sun coming out more often. Also, I managed to fit both my desk and dresser under my bed, so There is more floor space. :)

Beyond that, life has been pretty normal. Busy, but nothing exciting to report. 

Theresa and I have managed to resume our Saturdays at Wood's (a coffee place downtown). Coffee and chocolate keep me awake enough to get some studying and homework done!

I recently figured out (as I was procrastinating....) that the reflection in my electric kettle makes for some cool photos. :P

My boyfriend, Niles, got me flowers for Easter :) We'll have been dating 2 months on Tuesday.

Theresa and I have been making a bucket list for this quarter, and one of the things we really want to do is go into Seattle :) She's never been, so we'll get to do all the touristy things!

Last weekend Theresa, Paulina and I decided to venture out into the world on Saturday night. 

These are our "futuristic" faces.... ? Hahaha.

Sooo that's about it lately. 

I've been crazy busy with work, class, and homework. And I try to have a social life occasionally :)

Oh! And I recently found out that the apartment my friend Paulina and I want to move in to for next year might be opening up at the end of May, meaning we'd be here over the summer. A little different than what I'd been planning, but I'd be able to continue with nannying and hopefully get another job to save up for next year. It's a lot to take in at the moment, but it's also exciting!

I'll leave you with a random fact about me: 

I actually like watching sports. It took me awhile to realize it, but they're pretty fun. 

I also like looking at old cars because they're neat. 

:)

8 more weeks

...until I'm done with my first year at Western!

People always tell me that the older you get, the faster time goes. I'm going to have to say I believe it, because it doesn't seem that long ago that I was moving in. 

I haven't posted in forever (literally a month) so here's to making up for lost time!

I got through finals alive, did pretty well overall, and had a very low-key break (which I probably needed). I spent lots of time with my family, headed up to Auburn for a couple days and got to see friends, and did senior pictures for a guy from my high school. 

My family and I spend some time in downtown Portland eating at the food trucks :)

My lunch

We're obviously not used to the sun :P

Yum yum!

My dad and I completed this 550 piece puzzle. We couldn't give up once we started. 

My dad took me out to lunch and we continued to explore all the ethnic food in the world. 

Buy one, get one for 99 cents? Couldn't pass it up :)

Here are a couple of the photos I did for my friend, Tyler.

It rained and was FREEZING, but he was a good sport :)

I miss taking photos, and I definitely missed my camera!

(I accidentally left it at home for almost a month. It was horrible!)

These trees are awful for my allergies, but they're so pretty!

I obviously had too much time by myself. 

So I have lots of pictures like these....... :)

I also got the chance, courtesy of my wonderful mom and the SLP (speech-language pathologist) at her school, to job shadow during the week I was home! It was a really great opportunity to see what a typical day in the life of an elementary speech pathologist is like, and to assess my level of interest once I had that information. Luckily, it's everything I was expecting and more, so I'm going to keep heading down the path I'm on. :)

So at the conclusion of spring break, I headed back up to WWU. The day before the quarter started (last week), I had education program meetings alllllll day. It was very time-consuming, but orientations are important I guess. And they were mandatory :P 

This quarter I'm taking intro to teaching (so far very interesting, and it will for sure keep me busy!), lifespan development (also very intriguing, prepare to hear more about that one for sure), and Spanish. Only 15 credits, but they make for a crazy schedule!

Yellow - homework, orange and pink = tests and major assignments.

Blue = my one day off.

I hope you feel adequately updated on my life, if that was your goal when you started reading this!

I'll leave you with my interesting thought of the day: have you ever thought about how genuinely amazing the process of learning to speak is? Almost everyone in the world learns to do it, and it's expected, but the process itself is completely mind-blowing. The amount of memory and recall ability required, the speech patterns, voice inflictions, sounds, articulations, etc. involved... it is incredible that children can achieve all that, and not with "proper" teaching, but through imitation and practice alone. As my friend Sarah said, no wonder children need naps! Their little heads need time to recuperate :)